Monday, May 6, 2013
The other night I had a long time friend over to visit. We had not seen each other in about 8 years, long before I started my successful weight loss journey. We reminisced about old times and one of the things we talked about was how we have each changed over the years. One of the biggest changes in me is the confidence I have gained over the past many years. Some of that is due to growing older, and hopefully wiser! Some of that confidence was gained through various experiences during that time as a wife and mother. Some of that confidence is owed to service that I was able to perform for others during that time, which ultimately helped me grow.
There is, however, a portion of that confidence that I gained through my weight loss. Not because being skinny automatically makes you more confident. I wish that was true! Many of my insecurities were there before I gained the weight, while I was overweight and I still carry them with me even though I no longer carry the extra weight. No, it's not being skinny that made me confident. I think it was being successful with such an overwhelming thing.
I mean, let's be honest. It was totally overwhelming to think to myself..."I have gained 90 pounds since high school". WHAT?? How on earth did it get to be 90 pounds?? That's more than the weight of two of my kids combined! To think about needing to lose that much weight can be downright discouraging and overwhelming. I know that for years I was just completely overwhelmed by the idea. However, as I worked at it and I started to succeed I gained the confidence that I could do it. In fact, I started with a goal to lose just 45 pounds. That sounds relatively small now, but each time I weighed in and saw that I had lost another pound, or even just 1/2 pound, my confidence grew.
By the time I reached my original goal I had decided that wasn't enough. I knew that since I had lost 45 pounds I could lose more! At this point in time I decided I should talk to my doctor to find out what weight was healthy for me at my age. I hadn't started with the doctor because honestly I doubted that I would really lose more than 5-10 pounds, ok maybe 20 pounds. I honestly did not think I was capable of losing more than that. My doctor advised me to set a goal for another 35 pounds, and no more. I knew I could do that, my confidence was strong.
The interesting thing is that it wasn't just my confidence in losing weight that grew, it was confidence in myself in all aspects of my life. I became more sure of myself as a wife, as a mom, as a neighbor and as a friend. I didn't really recognize that "gain" until I was talking to my friend about it, until we were talking about High School and the way things used to be.
I'm thankful I took this journey and gained CONFIDENCE! With it you can do just about anything!